I often find that Father’s Day can come with mixed blessings for many fathers. I have known Dads who resent Father’s Day for it just reminds them of the poor job they did as dads. “If only I had spent more time with them… if only I had shown that I loved them more…if only I had read bible stories to them… if only I had been home more often…” I guess in some ways most dads can identify with those sentiments. It’s not always easy to be a good father. Thankfully, although certainly not an excuse, there is also forgiveness for our failures as dads.
I have also known sons and daughters who have resented their fathers for all sorts of reasons, perhaps understandably so in some cases, and in other cases not quite as clear-cut. Perhaps on these occasions, sons and daughters also need to come to a point where they can at least be ‘civil’ to their ‘imperfect’ fathers and perhaps reach out to them in a godly, winsome fashion. That doesn’t mean they need to condone poor or even unacceptable behaviour as a father. However, as Christian sons and daughters, our first responsibility is to love as our Heavenly Father has loved us. Who knows, perhaps their fathers may see the love of Jesus in their children’s hearts and be used by the Holy Spirit to turn their fathers back to becoming loving, godly fathers.
Interestingly, in the Old Testament, the nation of Israel is often portrayed as the child of God. Not only did God as their Father bring them into existence as a nation (Gen 12:1ff), He also cared, protected and provided for them like no other nation experienced on earth. However, unlike earthly fathers, Israel’s Father was perfect in every way and no one could question his devotion, love, and provision for His children. Sadly, that same love was often not reciprocated in kind. The prophet Isaiah laments Israel’s poor response to the care and love shown to them by their redeeming God. The prophet writes in Isaiah 5 that their Father God had done everything for them and nothing was left undone. Yet as His children, they continued to be disobedient towards their loving Father God. We see the same rebellion from Israel throughout the Old Testament.
And just as an earthly father cannot continue to stand idly by and allow His children to be disobedient towards Him, so also, Israel’s Father God could not remain indifferent to His children’s sinful behaviour. So, God their Father punished them for their sin, first gently, trying to correct and encouraged His children to turn back to Him. When that didn’t help, God sent them into exile. Yet even then, He did not forget His children and He returned them to their Promised Land after seventy years.
Ultimately, of course, the greatest love of the Father was seen for His children when He sent His Son to live amongst them and to die a cruel sacrificial death so that the sins of all his children would be atoned for in full. Those of us who are now His children in Christ cannot measure the depth and extent of such love. The Apostle John had a small understanding of it when he wrote, “How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called Children of God!” ( 1 Jn 3:1).
Those of us who are fathers, may our life not end up with too many “If only I had…” It’s never too late to rearrange our busyness to be the fathers God expects and what our children need. Happy Father’s Day. JZ